To kill the depression..to forget how futile my little life is ..To drown in a blanket of  soft nothing..But also to feel like a teenager ..I went over to my sisters house the other night..And spend an evening with her,her friend and her oldest son..The old women had coctails...He my nephew drank a beer and watched bewildered as both mommie and auntie lost the last bits of normality. Man !!! I got totally pissed..Had 8 coctails and two shots of liquir/likeur (jeezis what IS the right spelling?) And I hardly ever drink...I am glad that i spend my entire teenage years without a single drop of alcohol..(Ok fair is fair i smoked loads of pot..But pot is laidback always mixed with your own sense of rationality and the next day you dont feel a single thing)..Because although Im not really fond of the burning sensation of alcohol and the taste is often more disgusting then it is nice,I am quite fond of getting drunk...Dangerous realisation.

I miss my friends..It isnt cool to hang with the buddy of your sister .So lets get drunk on Absinth tonight..hahah Nope being sober is a nice state too..In about a coupla years I will have a night like that again..Glad...Cant imagine that a lot of folks get like this a coupla times a week....Thats Sick